Thursday, April 07, 2005

No Cough

No Cough
No Cough No Cough No Cough

The Cough
Is off
The Cough is off is off is off

We here
The Cough is off is off is off

No Cough
No Cough
No cough No Cough No Cough

Pronunciation: 'kof
Function: verb
Etymology: Middle English, from (assumed) Old English
cohhian; akin to Middle High German kuchen to breathe
intransitive senses

1 : to expel air from the lungs suddenly with an explosive noise
2 : a condition marked by repeated or frequent coughing

The Cough stands at around 5 '4 or 5 '5 and is shaped somewhat like a troll. The cough is female. The Cough has hair just a little shorter than shoulder length, permed, feathered, hair sprayed to perfection, and sits upon a head which hosts a face like a rat. The Cough is always dressed in either a grey, black, or brown business suit. The Cough has hunched shoulders and walks with a tilted head. The Cough has some form of cold 85% of the time which entails constant sniffing, snorting, and coughing. When The Cough is not sick The Cough still coughs. A drinking game could be played where a sip is taken for every cough and you could probably catch a pretty good buzz within an hour. The Cough speaks with a nasally voice. The Cough is who your narrator reports to daily. The Cough also is a lip smacker and whenever your narrator hears that sound behind him he knows it will immediately be followed with the question, "how's it going(cough!)?" This meaning, are you doing your work? This is a question your narrator and other folks are asked quite often on a daily basis. The Cough sits around the corner from this spot, but not today(cough!!).


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